From my experience when it comes to men, they tend to see things less complicated than women do. I had a conversation with a friend at work the other day who told me that he has a cookbook with easy recipes because it does not need to be complicated what is on his plate. He shared some of his favourites with me which I find so funny. Maybe you want to try some of his recipes. They are definitely easy to make but maybe not that healthy. 😀
Recipes from his cookbook
Hot Dog
Ingredients:
- 1 hot dog
- 1 bun
Directions:
1. Poke holes in the hot dog because otherwise, it might explode.
2. Put it in the microwave for thirty seconds.
3. Put hot dog in bun.
4. Boom! That’s all you need to do!
Stir Fry
Ingredients:
- Oh man, just go down to the supermarket, hit the produce section, and get some of everything. Carrots, snow peas, mushrooms, eggplant? Just whatever! Broccoli!
- They have all the veggies together in bags labelled “Stir Fry” now, but that’s cheating.
- Chicken if you feel fancy.
- Rice if you have time.
- Soy sauce from bottle or packets.
Directions:
1. Stir all of it together in a wok.
2. If you don’t own a wok, check around the apartment. The last people might have left behind a wok.
3. If not, it’s a great excuse to stop by someone’s house and introduce yourself.
4. My friend Wendy had a wok but it stayed at her house. I was over there a lot.
Ramen Noodles
Ingredients:
- 1 bag of Ramen
- Water
Directions:
1. Fifty-nine cents. You got chicken, beef, or pork.
2. I lived on Ramen for months. At least a meal a day, often two.
3. It… uh… I had to go to the health center because the salt intake was making me kind of fall apart. It was bad.
4. Boil the water, throw the thing in there, drain the water, put the powdery stuff in there.
5. I also started to have blurred vision from all that salt but my wife saved me by starting to cook at my place.
6. I saw a place up at Karlsplatz in Vienna the other day, a ramen restaurant. And their ramen costs like seventeen Euros for a bowl!
7. Prices have sure gone up!
Quesadilla or Burrito
Ingredients:
- Tortillas (1-2)
- Refried beans (can)
- Cheese, pre-shredded
Optional ingredients:
- Salsa
- Sour Cream
- Meat
- Guacamole
Directions:
1. Put beans and cheese in tortilla. Meat if you have some.
2. Microwave it. Maybe clean the microwave first. Which we never did when I was in college. I mean, it got pretty rank in that thing. We just forgot! I mean, this was our life: go to class and learn organic chemistry, Brit Lit, sociology. It was intense. And then party like crazy all weekend.
3. That microwave, though. Talk about organic chemistry. Wendy, now my wife, thought my quesadillas were disgusting.
4. Make sure that meat isn’t expired. Trust me.
Barbecue Chicken
Ingredients:
- Cut-up chicken parts (raw)
- Barbecue sauce (any)
Directions:
1. Slather the sauce on there and slap it on the grill.
2. Cook it all the way through. That’s important.
3. Otherwise, boom, back to the health center.
4. And friends who came to visit you before will say they’re getting a little tired of what they call your “pattern.”
5. And things will feel different when you recover and you might not have time to get things back to where you want them to be before it’s too late.
6. And then you’ll just have… life, you know?
7. Everything just goes away so fast.
8. Time flies. We have such little time.
9. Seriously, promise me you’ll cook the hell out of that chicken.
More Advice from Him on Giving Driving Directions to a Woman.
Assume a woman has the same deep knowledge of local landmarks and geography as you.
Deny the existence of digital mapping technology.
Ask whether she is “looking to take S3 or S4,” as if they know what you’re talking about.
Tell her the story about your friend X who lives “up in that area” and can help you if you get completely lost. Give her his number.
On second thought, tell her she should take S7 instead because you saw “some jokers racing on S3 and S4 the other day.”
Notice her tires “could use a little air.”
Point out that back roads are usually her safer bet.
Ask her for details about her car. Like all technical stuff and if she is able to change a flat tire.
Ask whether she is getting regular oil changes. Giggle while you say it.
Tell them about Daniel from your high school who wrapped his BMW around a huge oak tree over by S3.
Mention the extra oil filters you have lying around that happen to be an exact fit for her vehicle.
Insist on changing her oil. Now, don’t giggle. Or do.
Remind her that traffic will be a pain in the ass, and it’ll probably be easier to just stick around for dinner and wait until morning.
